Tuesday, September 14, 2010

No Big Deal

It is not a compliment if a guy wants to sleep with you. I know the attention seems flattering and for those 20 minutes (if you're lucky apparently), you may feel less lonely or whatever, or maybe you just do it cause it feels good, but trust me, it isn't anything to jump and scream about. Don't go thinking you're Helen of Troy, setting off thousands of ships, wars, and whatnot. It really isn't a big deal.

The reason is actually very simple: Most men will sleep with just about anybody given the proper circumstance. I know all the guys will immediately start sprouting how they wouldn't sleep with this one and that one, how they have standards, but let some alcohol be involved. Let him have not had any in a bit. Let Snooki climb into Vinny's bed drunk and kissing all over him and see what happens. He's gonna take it cause it's there. He's gonna go for the good old W.

Most guys' standard involves their conquest standardly having tits and a vagina. Easy breezy. So, it's safe to say if you have those two, I'm pretty sure a) he's gonna try you and b)you've got a chance.

Doesn't equate to much, though, this possibility, this "desire" of his, but it's definitely there. I tell you all this because perhaps it'll help some ladies out here. Maybe if you understand their psyche a bit more, you won't be so shocked by their shenanigans. It's rare that B is shocked anymore. It's possible I've heard it all before, but probably not. I just pay attention. To what? Well, I consider myself to be a pretty observant person, so I pay attention to the actions of others, what men do-their, uh, activities. For example, what do you learn when you watch one of those shark week specials? You learn that sharks, 9 times out of 10, are out there murking people left and right, so you know to either keep your butt out the ocean or enter at your own risk. It's possible to come out unscathed, but it's also possible to come out missing an arm or left pinky toe. Knowing this is half your battle.

Then there's what my guy friends tell me. That's really the only reason to keep them around. They are your little translator, so listen. Besides, unlike dude you rocked with last night, your homeboy loves you and will look out for you. (And he might try you some time too, he is a man and you are a woman, so do the math.)

Lastly, I pay attention to the crap that's happened in my own experience. Sure, I've fallen flat on my face a few times, but cut up enough and eventually you stop making the same mistakes over and over. I don't take a guy wanting me physically as anything more than just that-a fleeting feeling that disappears as soon as the nut is cracked.

That bitch stole my line,

xoxo
Blackie Collins

1 comment:

  1. Hon-nay, u hit the nail on the head, today!
    I do understand the male psyche, so much so in fact that I was starting to think just like them.
    Honestly, to them sex is purely a physical thing. The really do not attach emotions to it. It is something akin to scratching, belching or farting to them...a release. Nothing more, nothing less. Not to say they have NO EMOTIONS, theirs are just not wired the way as womens are. We go with our mind/heart when it comes to sex (usually) they go with that one-eyed monster!
    I remember vividly coming out of a bad divorce, I really did not want to date and I did not really want a relationship, but I wanted male companioship and did not want to get hurt. I talked to myself in manspeak "just dont put your heart into it and you will be ok" I did that and it worked. Worked too well in fact. I have been mostly single for the past 10 years (oh, except for that 2nd husband experiment, we'll get back to that at another time) I have 3 kids, work, try to have a balanced life. Why would I want a man? I have 3 children, I don't want 4!!! and, I refused to get a toy because if I get one, it's over with me and men...you mean I can get the D without the ig'nant motherhugger attached???? woooooooooooooooo!
    also, i am deathly afraid of my children or mother finding it/them in the event of my untimely death! LOL! (btw, I did find 2 dildos going through one of my recently dearly departed family members....no surprise there if you knew him! *how u doin'?*)

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