Thursday, March 11, 2010

The Laws of Attraction

Women have lots of ways of describing men. We have our own caste system, our own lingo and vocabulary to categorize the men that come in and out of our lives or even just pass us by on the street. It isn't complicated but the words you may take as compliments may not be that entirely, so read on boys-see what she's really saying when she says you're "cute." And ladies, when your friends meet your man and say he's "handsome," what exactly do they mean? And as always, please feel free to add your own...

Attractive: This is pretty basic. It isn't anything special, so when a girl says, "he's attractive," it's kinda the nice way for saying he's okay looking. He is attractive to someone, somewhere, maybe just not her.

Fine: This is one word which is pretty obvious and pretty universal. When someone calls a man fine or more importantly the emphasis they put behind their words. She will never just say, "eh, he's fine." It will always be, "good got damn, he's fine," or some sort of sound effect similar to moaning before she claims he's "fine as hell." You know if you get told that, well, you probably already knew you were fine. And ladies, if your girls ever say your man is fine, be careful, hold tight, cause they sure as hell will if given the chance.

Handsome: You're dad could be handsome, it isn't bad, but it isn't fine either. It's just good-looking, nice-looking, regal, dateable. The kind of man you'd see in a Sears men's sale ad. It's nice, but she'd still be pulling for her genes to be the dominant ones should children be involved down the road.

Cute: As much as we like the word cute, you do not want to be cute. Cute is what your little brother is. Cute is what your guys stuck in the friend zone are. You don't want cute. Leave cute to teddy bears and puppies.

Pretty: We think you're homosexual most likely. But you are pretty. Bask in that, I guess.

Descriptive words that have nothing to do with looks: Girl: "Isn't he sooo cute!?" Friend: "He is so nice! And funny and that job, girl, you're gonna be rollin." Sorry, he's uggs, and I don't mean the boots.

That bitch stole my line,


Blackie Collins


  1. my ex husband (20 years ago) could have been a double for Idris Elba (finer than froghair)nowadays, he's ...i would not even say handsome...with the excess weight and hair loss...but he did have it going on at one time in particular! My daughter looks most like him and she is very beautiful! The two sons, seriously, one looks like he could be Shaq's and the other like Allen Iverson, go figure!

  2. I prefer Alright, meaning I'd hit, but only if there was nothing else to do