Thursday, February 25, 2010

The Leggings Effect

I was walking from the gym, clad in sweats, hiding under a baseball cap like I was a Kardashian when a woman brushed by me in a pair of thin leggings. I noticed that she had a rear end that wars were probably fought over, something I noticed since I have one that won't even cause a schoolyard fight let alone a world war. I wasn't the only one who noticed, though. The way the masses parted while men crained necks, rolled eyes and all but passed out as she walked by was incredible. Hysterical actually.

One of my best friends has the best ass I've ever seen. She works out constantly to have the derrière. It's the kind of booty that would make anyone do a couple extra lunges or take the stairs. Several weeks ago, we went to a friends party and this girl had thee nerve to wear denim leggings. She swore they were jeans, but they weren't. And boy or boy. I'm straight and I wouldve tapped that ass. I wasn't the only one who was enthralled either.

And finally, this past weekend my boy and I were about to head out for a night in the streets. I was getting dressed and when I asked if the outfit was cool, he said, "I'm always a fan of leggings." Yup, I had on a pair shiny leggings that give even little-booty me a looker.

Leggings are a great, simple fashion trend, one that isn't in style just because of their comfort and cute-match-everything factor. They're definitely flying off shelves and stomping down the streets of NYC because of the effects leggings have on men and women love it. What it boils down to is the fact that men are, for the zillionth time, very simple creatures. All they need are a basic pair of leggings to help them on their way.

Much obliged, boys, much obliged.

That bitch stole my line,

Blackie Collins


  1. You should write about the dark-side of leggings. I love my leggings to death, BUT they have been abused. Women are strutting down the streets in tights trying to pass them off as leggings. I really wish women would understand the difference. If I can see your underwear, you are wearing tights!! Not leggings.

    Sorry to vent in your comment section girl

  2. i keep telling my kids..."that's sooooo 80's"
    like Granny used to say, nothing new under the sun! i remember getting followed to class (that i did not share with the follower) when i used to wear leggings in h.s.