Friday, February 26, 2010

He's Just Not That Into You...Or Is He?

Ladies, time and time again, we find ourselves in a situation of sorts. One where we're feeling a guy and based on a couple of things, he's feeling you too. Then we're slapped with the reality, they are just not that into us.

I've learned a lot from my guy friends along the way and after listening to this story, I knew I had to share to help my girls out there. A good guy friend, Rich, started seeing this girl, Adrienne. I know Adrienne pretty well, she's a friend who I hang out with from time to time and always have fun with her. We chat each other up online and sometimes talk on the phone, but make no mistake, she isn't a close friend. And between the two of them, Rich is my homie, Adrienne is not.

Rich was seeing Adrienne, giving her all the signals that he was into her, but his complaints were that Adrienne was crazy thirsty, majorly pressed, wouldn't back up and let things happen. A simple phone text to Adrienne and she was changing her BBM and g-chat statuses to topics dealing with him. All her tweets mentioned a mysterious "he" and constantly eluded to a new boyfriend on the horizon. This, of course, freaked Rich out. It would've freaked anyone out. Adrienne is the kind of clingy female that gives normal girls a bad name. At any rate, things progressed or should I say continued, and eventually, it got so annoying, Rich checked out, leaving Adrienne more or less heartbroken (based on her g-chat status picture of a broken heart).

But then Rich told me the details, and I had to pull him back. It wasn't just a case of Adrienne being a cling-on. Rich kept calling, kept sleeping with her, letting her stay with him when she'd come to hang out, and did enough to make Adrienne believe things were going great. Apparently, his pillow talk game was superseding, and after a few sweet conversations between the sheets, Adrienne was in like flynn. Or she thought she was. Rich, however, was just being a guy and keeping good p*ssy in his life without too many strings. Granted, Rich swore he liked her, said her attachment issues were what pushed him away, but Rich's actions were just so misleading. Case and point: he was supposedly done with her. Told her as much after she came in town and basically moved her stuff in, but then a few weeks later, he came to visit her, despite being "done." He came, stayed with her and when he realized she was still crazy, he tried to call it off again, went out, left all his stuff at her house without saying a word as to when or if he was coming back (he didn't).

The issue is that while he was "figuring it all out," he was putting off signals that he wanted Adrienne and that's really all Adrienne could go on, she's not a mind reader. Now, I could write an entire post about thirsty girls who need to calm the hell down, but not today. This is about reading a man's signals. About seeing all of them, not just the one's you want to see or hear. Rich told Adrienne several times over that she needed to back up a bit, that he wasn't looking for a girlfriend, but Adrienne seemed to give more weight to the pillow talk. Don't. believe. pillow. talk. I don't know how else to say it. Everyone talks a great game when they're lying in bed with you. Guys took a class in it and are well versed. I wish there was some way to tell you how to read men better, but all I can say is keep your guard up as long as possible, to really pay attention with an unbiased eye. To watch and learn. Pay attention to everything, not just what you want or hope or imagine in your head.

And when in doubt, ask your boys for some advice. They will always tell you when you're getting played.

That bitch stole my line,


Blackie Collins


  1. i could not even finish the to adrienne...she gave up tha nappy dugout too like the chase...the longer you hold out...the more they are interested...does that mean he's "the one" NO! but let that monkey air out sometimes, dang, thirsty azz broads, give real women a bad rep!

  2. lol you're the best!
    you always keep it real & funny as hell!